What a journey!
Looking back a year ago I was doing 2 jobs, trying to juggle everything and make ends meet. It was an automatic “no” if anyone said “can we have/that looks nice/I need” as I was petrified we would run out of money too soon. We invariably did and the last 2 weeks of the pay month were scrimping for just about everything. Hubby was up and down work wise, we were stung for 2 lots of assurance (critical illnes, death stuff, unemployment) for the mortgage and I spent ages on websites trying to find ways to save money on just about everything. Oddly enough I spent even more doing so and felt in a blind panic all the time. Trying to run faster and faster both at work and home and feeling like a hamster in a great big wheel going absolutely nowhere.
Then I contacted payplan in October and after lots of calls an iva was suggested, so I went all guns blazing for that. We decided that the iva would be sorted out and then we would do a dmp for hubby……….it was always at the back of my mind churning away and when it was declined 6th jan I was lost. The declining reason was that the creditors saw 2 lots of life assurance going out and wanted the money from one. At that point hubby was bringing in even less money and several things were cancelled – both assurances being one! Rather a snotty call from the chap from the IVA saying we should have redone our I andE to which I replied that circumstances had changed very quickly so there was no time.
We then decided on a joint dmp and Payplan lost my paperwork! It happens and although I was furious at the time was very very professional with them………until I was sent all the wrong figures and wrong names, oh you name it, it went wrong.
On top of this I lost both my grandparents within 6 weeks, Xmas was fairly good but I felt as though “we had not made much of an effort” and was glad to get back to work. In Feb I had to put one of my dogs to sleep which really upset me and although work was great the stress was really getting to me and one individual was really getting under my skin!!!!!
It had been suggested to me by a great friend about bankruptcy but at that time I felt a resounding NO. I read page after page on a lot of forums about it and thought, well, perhaps we should look into it.
After the Payplan fiasco we went to see a lovely lady from an Insolvancy Practioner who went through everything and said the iva was the worst she had ever seen and that we were perfect for bankruptcy. She answered our million questions and said that the consultation was free but if we felt we needed her help going forward there would be a charge.
We decided to do it ourselves and even joked about how farwe were percentage wise on line! The court date was 3rd March and armed with everything went in………………they were lovely and friendly, had a quick call with a human OR and we have our phone call interviews at the end of this month and beginning of April.
Then we went to open a new bank account and my god did we feel like lepers! That brought us down and we came home after a few hours and decided to leave it all for a day or so, to relax and sleep.
Today I feel…………….odd. Liberated, more relaxed and not like I am continously trying to run faster. There will be times when things will be difficult but today – hubby left me a coffee for when I woke up, the dogs are very happy crunching on bones and even the sun has come out. Things havent stopped dead but are a more relaxed journey.
I will keep blogging, not every day but as and when, if I try to do too much I will feel under pressure and can do without that!
Take care,
1 Step xx
